Trust = (Self awareness + curiosity) x Practice!
We make assumptions all the time about people, places, situations. We are looking for the pattern we can recognize and depending on our own need for control - something we can hold on to, to feel comfortable enough to make a move. It requires vulnerability and courage.
Those stories we make up in our mind can take us forward or keep us stuck in an old pattern. The best way is to start with questions for yourself and others.
What’s at stake for you?
What are you afraid of losing or gaining?
How do you build trust with others? and with yourself?
Look to yourself, seek to understand them, and the situation and context of work through the lens of a science experiment you can be sure to improve your situation now and forever. Being willing to look deeply both at what is pleasant and unpleasant will unlock the learning and put you back in a growth mindset
It also requires support - its hard to face difficult situations or relationships that are important and may not be going the way or with the ease you’d hoped. So both (1) taking an objective data based view - what are the facts - and leveraging the powers of observation over time (self awareness) you can experiment with ways to improve your skills and the situation.
Lean in to curiosity - pay attention to that small or loud voice in your head with open hearted curiosity. Leverage our practice sheet for deepening trust and strengthening relationships. Reach out for a 15 min coaching session. Take out your journal and begin a scientific analysis to what is going on - what’s your part of the equation? what can you ask to clarity theirs and the organizations?
A client has a new boss - she is noticing that when she bravely comes back to him after a meeting to ask a clarifying question(s), she gets more aligned and more support. The result greater autonomy and confidence. And it takes courage to come back and ask the question - do I understand this right…
She can leverage what the organization puts in place for supporting the work. Reviews of projects and product progress. 1:1 and skip level meeting for context and clarity. Their wiki or notion documents that provide context, etc.
Lean in to the topic with some great resources - here are a few:
Book a coaching call
Its worth the effort and the courage it takes to get there :D
Thanks ya’all for reading - if you found this helpful or know someone who would - please pass it on. I’d like more people to benefit from the wisdom in our practice and community.
I work with tech leaders on: getting to the next level, creating the conditions for consistent high performance for themselves and their teams. If you’re interested in how I can support you or your team, learn more about my coaching or book a free coffee here.